Helpless, Erotic Compulsion

Cuckoldry is associated with feelings of shame, weakness, helplessness, trepidation, insecurity and fear. Yet guilt-fueled arousal and erotic excitement also reach exponential intensity. Men have reported spontaneous orgasms, and women have reported becoming soaked – instantly, and that merely from discussing this with her or his spouse. If Nature intends for this phenomena to lead to sexual activity, a more effective mechanism could hardly be imagined.

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In many marriages a time comes when secret yearnings cannot be repressed or ignored. Like so many ocean waves, secret thoughts or desires surface repeatedly. Time and again they are pushed back down inside from where they came. We do so out of fear of what might be – if the truth were told.

But for some, this strategy fails. It fails because no less than ocean waves that recede after each wave, those desires return with redoubled force. It may be a week or years, but that desire will return. Each time, it gathers more strength. Each time, the shock of it lessens, and the appeal of it increases. These desires seem more natural and less objectionable. With each season, these desires reward the woman or man in question with greater pleasure.

Whether you resist the cuckold fetish THIS time is irrelevant. That desire will return. It will come with renewed urgency. The naturalness, beauty, pleasure, power and eroticism will make it harder to resist. The goodness, rightness and pleasure it makes you feel erodes the ability to resist. And each time, those qualities are more apparent to us. So if not this time, then the next time, and if not then, it will be the time after that.

The sense that this is SUPPOSED to be will only grow. And there is no escaping it.

Once your wife discovers the pleasures of a fantasy lover, once this desire becomes the script that controls and drives her response, she isn’t going to change. Once your husband acquires a taste for cuckoldry, once he decides that he loves it, that’s it! It’s over.

There’s really very little you or anyone else can do to save him. 

So instead, we choose to hide these thoughts; only allowing ourselves to ponder them during moments of extreme arousal brought on by sexual fantasies of the most perverse nature. But, once in while, someone in a marriage will break the normal pattern and choose to admit the secret lusts of their heart.

And sometimes, they find that their spouse is eager finally to act upon them.
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Have you wanted that conversation with your spouse? Have you tried to host it? How did it go?